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“Dear Shane, I’m your biggest fan…”

Posted in: Family Life, Uncategorized | January 11, 2016

fan mail

“Mom, we have a problem.”

I blinked, trying to focus on my daughter and her probing look. Only moments ago, I was studying, my mind full of the sounds of ancient Israel: the shrill cry of blasted horns, stomping feet, the thundering crash of an enormous wall splitting and crumbling apart, the bellowed cries of victory…

Jericho would have to wait for a moment.

I swiveled in my chair to face my daughter, noting the anxious lines around her eyes.

“What’s wrong?”

“Callie.”

“What happened to her?”

Bethany pursed her lips in irritation. “She’s crying.”

“Why?”

Taking a deep breath, my oldest daughter spilled the problem. “You know how I’m going to marry Shane Harper, right?”

(For those of you who aren’t aware, Shane Harper is my twelve year old’s crush. shane harper You know him, right? The young cutie who played the lead in “God’s Not Dead”? Yeah, Bethany is ga-ga over him. Talks about him constantly. Believes they are destined to be forever together. If it was up to her, they would already be picking out retirement plans and buying a mini van to haul around their three kids, two cats and dog to soccer practice. The girl’s got it bad.)

“Marry Shane Harper? Oh, of course.” I wondered if she even noticed my eye roll. eye roll 2

“You know how I was going to write him a fan letter?”

“Yeah…”

Bethany huffed. “I was telling Callie about it and, when I pulled out a sheet of paper and my glitter pens, she suddenly burst into tears.”

“Why?”

“She says I love Shane Harper more than her.”

Lovely. Pre-teen, girly drama. Over a boy. A boy who is about a decade-plus too old for both of them. A boy who has no idea either of them exist. Literally.

I sighed.  “Did you tell Callie you love her? That what she’s worried about isn’t even true?”

“I tried, but she just won’t believe me.”

Groaning, I leaned my head against the chair. “You know what the problem is? Callie sees your adoration for Mr. Wonderful and is feeling insecure. She needs to know you love her. She looks up to you.”

Huffing in exasperation, Bethany lifted her hands. “How am I supposed to do that? She won’t listen to me!”

I grinned. “What were you about to write Shane Harper?”

“A fan letter.”

“Yep. But you know what you have to do now? You’re going to write a fan letter to your sister.” writing letter

Bethany dashed away to get to work. She filled a letter full of admiration. Full of encouragement. Not flattery, but honest, kind words meant to heal.

“Dear Callie,

I’m your biggest fan. You’re so much fun to be with. You always make me laugh and I love being your sister. You’re sweet, funny and smart. I love you!…”

Although I didn’t see the fan letter’s delivery to a sniffling little sister with bruised feelings, Bethany said when Callie read it, her face lit up and her tears vanished, replaced with amazement. A little smile ghosted her face. All was well. All was understood and forgiven.

Do you have a relationship in your life that is strained? Someone who feels unappreciated? Are there hurt feelings or misunderstandings? What about that person you just can’t seem to get through to no matter how hard you try? Try writing them a fan letter.

No, I’m not talking flattery to puff up. I’m talking about love that heals. I’m talking about seeing past your own frustration to see the brokenness and need of the one who is hurting.

big fan

Insecure people cry. They need love and they need to feel loved. When people know they are loved, despite their flaws and mistakes, it changes things. It changes them.

Pen a fan letter. Make that hurting person feel like a rock star. Those hurts and tears and walls of rejection will crumble and disappear. Kind of like the walls of Jericho.

Now, back to my study time…

Have you ever penned a fan letter? Has someone ever written you an admiration letter? How did it make you feel? What are ways to show love to someone who has misunderstood you or is hurting?

Tags: dealing with sibling fights, fan letters, fighting kids, loving the hurting, parenting advice, preteen drama, Shane Harper, Showing love

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. AvatarJeanne Takenaka says

    January 11, 2016 at 5:11 pm

    Tara, what great insight you share here! I love how your older daughter “got it.” And what a beautiful application point for us.I’m going to pray and see if there’s anyone I need to write a fan letter to. 🙂

    Reply
  2. Avatarjennycarlisle says

    January 11, 2016 at 7:07 pm

    What a terrific idea! I love this.

    Reply
    • AvatarTaraJohnsonAuthor says

      January 11, 2016 at 10:09 pm

      I worked on my youngest daughter…and my husband last time we had a tiff. 🙂

      Reply

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Tara JohnsonTara Johnson is a writer, singer, speaker and passionate lover of stories. Tara uses fiction, nonfiction, song and laughter to share her testimony of how God led her into freedom after spending years living shackled to the expectations of others. She lives in central Arkansas with her husband and children.

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